The Digital Dispatch

From NOEBIE.net

Five People

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I was once at the center of the circle
Now, in a dream, more spare part than man
I walk vague halls
Nothing quite as it
         ought to be
An odd new building
         across the street
Where the folks’ house should stand
It looks, at the edges,
         like a stage backdrop
If it fell away
The house would be there

This is not right

I amble along the corridor
Turning left
And the hall seems narrower
Than it was before

Okay
This is not right

The First is absent
Apparently gone
Leaving an emptiness that
         cannot be filled

Three are busy
With the crushing grind
Of pretending to be who they think they are
Doing their best
Sometimes sorrowful
Sometimes numb
         tinged with nagging regret

I do my best
         to tidy up the coals
My keepers dutifully kind
Lacking the truth
         of empathy
So many to tend
So much to do

In this dream
I am just another dodderer
Gathering my things
Always the last to leave
This is not right
God, this is not right
Please let me wake up
And let it be back to right

They usher in my special guest
She approaches as one would approach someone who might not remember
Formal
Tentative

“Hi, Jack.”

Is that my name?
Oh, yes. That’s what she has always called me.

As I move to embrace
Welling Up
She seems surprised
Utters a polite “Oh” of acceptance
         and pats me softly

We came here for just this only:
To learn to love

We are such poor students

Methods of Authoritarian Control

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Cult of Trump BookSteven Hassan, who wrote the book on The Cult of Trump, uses an interesting model to help assess and describe typical methods of authoritarian control.

This is, perhaps, a good time to become familiar with his BITE Model (Behavior, Information, Thought and Emotions).

You can learn more, and download a PDF guide, at this link.

Books I Read in 2025

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Brqy Antifa BookHere’s the list of books I finished in 2025. Another mixed bag. 🙂

Tara: The Liberating Power of the Female Buddha
Rachael Wooten, PhD

The Creative Act: A Way of Being
Rick Rubin

Consciousness Is All There Is
Dr. Tony Nader

All The Pretty Horses
Cormack McCarthy

Lunch Poems
Frank O’Hara

Solipsis Eclipse
Dustin Cormier

The Art Spirit
Robert Henri

Meditations In An Emergency
Frank O’Hara

YouTube Secrets
Cannell & Travis

The Green Witch’s Guide to Herbal Magick
Annabel Margaret

The Secret Teachings Of Jesus
Four Gnostic Gospels
Translated by Marvin W. Meyer

Rebel Witch
Kelly-Ann Maddox

Spells For Change
Frankie Castanea

Kriya Yoga and the Primordial Powers of Creation
Ryan Kurczak

Magic For The Resistance
Michael M. Hughes

Antifa: The Anti-Fascist Handbook
Mark Bray

What have you been reading?

New Tubes for a Vintage Amp

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When I was playing music for a living, I spent ridiculous amounts of time and money obsessing over gear. One of my “Holy Grail” items was an old Blackface Deluxe amp. Glenn Frey played through one, and I really wanted to be Glenn Frey when I grew up.

I was at my friend Mike’s house buying some JBL speakers from him, and noticed an empty Fender cabinet. “Oh, yeah. That’s an old Deluxe. I found it in a barn, covered with bird shit.” He had given the chassis to one of my bandmates for parts. So I bought the cabinet from Mike for $25, along with an extra JBL for $50. Then I talked my bandmate, Andy, out of the chassis. All I needed was somebody to put the amp back in operating condition.

I found a repair guy in Decatur, Illinois who called himself “The Amp Doctor.” He was reluctant to take on any new projects, but when I told him what it was – an early 1960s Blackface Red Jewel Fender Deluxe, he agreed to take a look at it. He went back to the original schematics and parts vendors as much as possible, and made the thing as close as he could to how it would have been when it rolled off the line at the factory. About the only component where he compromised was the power cord (the original would have been cloth covered, with no grounding prong). I believe his bill was either $180 or $210 or somesuch. This would have been in the mid 1980s.

The amp was just a screamer, especially with the JBL D120F speaker in it. The repair guy told me that it was a transitional model, produced after CBS bought Fender, but before they made any significant design changes.

A few years back, I noticed that it was dropping out some when I played through it. So I started using it as a speaker cabinet for a Quilter amp head. Recent discussions with Mike, and another old bandmate, Lem, prompted me to replace the tubes and see how it sounds.

As I began removing the old tubes, I noticed that one from the main power section was cockeyed and hanging from the socket. I suspect that this was the cause of the amp cutting out. 🙂

I took video of the process of changing the tubes, and a quick test run. It still sounds marvelous after all these years.

In terms of reliability, range of sounds and ease of transport, I know that more recent amps offer a lot of advantages, but there is something so romantic about these old Fenders. I was considering selling this one, as they are going for astronomical prices these days. After hearing it again, now I’m not so sure.

More info on the tubes and the process are in the video and the YouTube description box.

Some Thing Suspicious

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The glow of tubes in the bathtub cast a sickening turbulence on synergistic seafaring pinecones primed for rigorous cowboy cocktails your table is ready ma’am stop that right now that is enough even in this poor draft if you look softly and mind your wrecking cadence there will seldom run leaves of some thing suspicious if thoughts come what where even monkeys and werewolves and coffee and radio and drones and donuts and locusts of the harvest is missing what if everything went missing again.

Some Thoughts on Witnessing Genocide

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Flag of PalestineMore than once over the past twenty months, I’ve noted people expressing the following sentiment. “If you have ever wondered what you would have done in the face of the atrocities of Nazi Germany, you can find out by examining what you are doing right now.”

Indeed, we are currently witnessing the crime of the century in Gaza.

For nearly two years now, the world has watched as cruelty and misery escalate beyond what most of us could have imagined.

As individuals here in the US, we cannot stop it. But I believe that we have an obligation to do at least a couple of things to the extent that we are able.

Our first obligation is to be faithful witnesses. As tempting as it may be, we must not turn away. We must continue to acknowledge and speak the truth about this genocide and the historical and political conditions that have brought it about.

I believe that we also have an obligation to help provide what aid and comfort that we can to the victims of this slaughter. Although it seems almost futile at the moment compared to the need, if one hungry child receives a meal, if one person in pain receives medical attention, then any contributions we can make are worth making.

Frankly, any efforts we make are not enough. They do not absolve any of us. But they are all that we seem to have at the moment.

There are many, many organizations, large and small, helping to alleviate suffering and provide hope to people living in Gaza, and to Palestinian refugees. Find the ones you vibe with, and do your best.

Here are a few links that I have found to be helpful.

Decolonize Palestine – This site was important to me in shedding the programming and propaganda that poisoned the minds of Americans of my generation concerning the region.

Donate to Help a Displaced Family in Palestine – The organizer, Kyle, is a personal friend of mine. He interviewed Nour in 2021 for an article about children in Gaza, and was prompted to do what he can to help this family. It has been heartbreaking to follow the updates on this page, but we do have an opportunity to help them survive and let them know that people here care about them.

Doctors Without Borders – One of the most trusted organizations providing medical aid in Gaza and elsewhere.

UNICEF – Another trusted international organization providing food, shelter and other support.

Zakat Foundation of the United States – One of the largest and most respected Muslim led charitable organizations in the US. Recommended by my friend Khalid.

Cwtches to Gaza – Direct aid to refugees (and their family members still in Gaza).

Blessings and peace to you.

Twenty-One Breaths

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With Three Breaths
We rouse the Energy
and prime
its pathway

With Fourteen Breaths
We charge the pathway
and center the Energy
in an
upward flow

With Four Breaths More
We see the Light
We hear the
sacred
ॐ

Breathless
We learn to become
clear
awake
and free

What I’m Reading: The Green Witch’s Guide to Herbal Magick

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Herbal Magick BookI’ve been reading (and watching) a lot of witchy material these days. Annabel Margaret’s The Green Witch YouTube Channel has become one of my favorites. Her depth of knowledge, sensible approach and calming presence make the channel a pleasure to watch.

Her book, The Green Witch’s Guide to Herbal Magick, is a marvelous introduction to the subject. It includes lots of practical and philosophical information, common preparations and practices, details on numerous herbs, and a spell compendium for use and adaptation.

What I like best about the book is that it covers the “why” questions. It’s not just a list of instructions, but the principles behind them. She includes background on why things work they way they do, and how we can use this knowledge to make the practice our own.

Even if you’re not interested in formal spellwork or imbuing the workings with specific intent, a lot of what she imparts would be fun for mundane crafting and culinary use.

Although accessible to beginners, this book moves beyond to serve as a great guide through the intermediate stages of practice. I’m thankful to have found it.

 

Peace Can Be Louder Than War

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In May of 2024 I learned about this cool project from one of my favorite bands, Merry Hell. They crowdsourced a choir for the recording of this peace anthem, written by Virginia Kettle.

Each of us (representing five continents) sent in audio of ourselves singing along, and the band mixed them all together to form the “1000 Voice Choir.”

The recording debuted on New Year’s Day and rose to the Top Twenty of the Folk Alliance International Folk Chart shortly after its release.

The message is timely, and timeless. Here’s a wish that “some with their minds unconsciously blind” will be awakened by listening.

Peace.